Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Randomize
