no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
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