I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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