i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
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