I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize