I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
Randomize
