I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
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