Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
one two three fourrrrnication!
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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