The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
Randomize