My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
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