at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Randomize
