its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
I smell like Dick and happiness
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Randomize
