yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
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