she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
you will always have a special place in my vag
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Randomize
