508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize
