She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
Randomize
