this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
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