have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
