He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
Ladies don't puke and tell
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
