is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
His hands were made for my vagina.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
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I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
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