ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.