im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
Randomize
