broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize