There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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