thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
Randomize