Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
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