then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Randomize
