hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
