Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
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