I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
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