i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Randomize
