I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
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