A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
Randomize
