that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
Randomize
