May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
