we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
So squirting runs in the family.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
