found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Randomize
