She said her name was "party"
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
