Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Randomize
