is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Randomize