You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize
