Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
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Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
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You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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