can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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