i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Randomize
