my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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