Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
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