I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
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