I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
I am available for nakedness
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
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