i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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