Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
